poeticterms | (no subject)

(no subject)

The thing about the Stark house is that it looks perfectly normal unless you are paying attention.

Perfectly normal houses are not covered in quite so many discreet cameras. Nor do they have pressure sensors under the driveway to record where guests choose to park. (Jarvis is already learning Cal's favourite spots in the loop.)

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"Can I take over the country and institute a hereditary monarchy?" asks Sherlock. "Would anyone mind?"

"I'm not cynical, I'm realistic."

It's not Cal's fault they're the same thing.

To Sherlock he says,

"I dunno, that'd make Mother a nightmare to live with."

"I could make you king," he suggests. "Or would that be worse?"

"Sherry, quit plotting treason in my kitchen."

"Then I could just throw her in the dungeon. Okay, I'm in."

Tony didn't say anything about Cal not plotting treason!

"Or perhaps send her into exile," he suggests, ignoring Tony, "or assign a division of the royal army to keep watch on her. Aha, I believe I have found a new job for Peter Beardsley."

Cal grins.

"Yeah, he'd be all over that," he says.

"You" - gesturing to Tony with his pizza - "can do all the building stuff."

Now he's getting into it, too.

"Oh yeah. Jarvis, how do you feel about being a royal palace?"

"The notion has a certain whimsical appeal," he allows.

"Computerized palace," Cal says. "Awesome."

"The best computerized palace," he says emphatically. "And yeah, about that royal army? Shit, when I'm done with it you could conquer the world."

"That'd be the next logical step," Cal agrees.

Hey, once you get started, you may as well keep going.

"Which would be bad, and we totally shouldn't do it."

Tony is responsible!

"But it would be so much fun."

"And if we don't do it, Mother probably will," Cal puts in.

And they, obviously, would be much better for the world.

"Preemptive conquest is the only option."

"Now, now, children. Don't get carried away."

"But we haven't made any real plans yet," Cal objects, briefly forgetting, in his preoccupation, that Jarvis is a computer.

The amusement in his voice is as close as Jarvis ever gets these days to a laugh.

"So long as it stays that way," he allows.

"Party-pooper."

"Maybe we should get a different computerized palace."

If that's how Jarvis is going to be.

"Perish the thought. He'd be terribly lonely without us."

"Nothing but squirrels for company," he says in melancholic tones.

"Squirrels are cool."

Cal considers.

"They could bring you acorns."

This represents the sum total of his knowledge of squirrels.

He can't help it. A merry beep/whistle escapes from the speakers.